Danny Dyer’s kicking right off. He’s taking drags off his rollie, his eyes are rolling back in his head. He’s clammy to the touch. His shirt sleeve, ripped ragged, trails off his hairy arm. He’s breathing heavily. He’s really mad.
Because Danny Dyer’s been handing out some digital justice, Danny Dyer-style, to Twitter trolls who thought they could best him. And you need to see the f**king state of them now.
TOP NEWS
“Didn't think it was ever possible for a man to be uglier than the fish he's caught. #horribleslimyboat,” he fired off at one young scally, who no doubt has had the smirk wiped off his face. Look at that excellent hashtag execution. Guarantee no-one’s ever used that before on Twitter.
But he wasn’t done there. Check out the wisdom he dispensed to “Mike”, a gentleman of indeterminate age, who decided to take on Danny on the subject of football:
“Pipe down Mike. You're from Scotland and you support Man United. Bet you wish you picked Chelsea now. #stringvest.”
WOAH. BURN. BUUUUUUURN. OPEN UP THE FIRST AID KIT AND GET OUT THAT SALVE. YOU KNOW. FOR THAT BURN. PUT THE SALVE- YEAH, PUT IT ON THE BURN. THAT BURN. NO, UP A BIT. THAT’S THE ONE.
The EastEnders star then rounded on someone who started on his appearance, telling him: “So it must kill you to look like a really soapy fat sh*t version of me.”
Bahahaa. Ahahahaaaa. HARR.
But his last insult to a troll really stepped it up a level. “Liam” had made a (pretty fair) point about Danny’s track record of straight-to-DVD films, and Danny responded thusly:
“Mate you look like an earthworm who's whacked a hoodie on.”
That’s it, we’re done. The internet has become pure poetry. We’re outta here.
Danny Dyer's best quotes of all time
Danny Dyer's best quotes
1 of 20"Gonna watch a bit of #questiontime while munching on a toasted crumpet that's absolutely pissing with marmite…;)…..sophistication."
2 of 20"I've realised with insomnia that you are never really awake and you're never really asleep…..a trippy surreal existence."
3 of 20"Just to let you know the fact I'm tweeting about dog costumes don't assume it's coz I'm f**ked out my nut on drugs. ;-) Many thanks."
4 of 20"It was a real lesson. (Countdown) My new favourite long word is "Discomf**kingbobulate". Rachel didn't know what f**king hit her. ;)"
5 of 20"F**king love a Big Mac me…"
6 of 20"Just watched Ratatouille with the Littlen………f**k me I was rooting for that rat…."
7 of 20"Tonight I will be on the Gadget show on Channel 5 @ 8 o Clock. If you're interested………enjoy……..if not……..well…….get f**ked..x"
8 of 20"Jeremy Kyle….fair play…how the f**k do you find the most unf**kable people to have ever walked the planet….."
9 of 20"Well that was weird. Found a lovely pond/lake not a f**king duck in sight. Maybe they was shy…..or maybe they was arrogant……..pricks."
10 of 20"I hate that early bird………. You know the one who catches the worm………get back in ya nest ya feathery little mug……….."
![Just whacked me [Christmas] tree upu2026.it's looking slightly camp this yearu2026..can't work out how 2 give it a pair a bollocks.](https://images.bauerhosting.com/legacy/lifestyle-legacy/e8/3a44c/4d3b6/accca/65fd5/a7354/80cbc/danny-dyer11_620x713.jpg?auto=format&w=1440&q=80)
11 of 20"Just whacked me [Christmas] tree up….it's looking slightly camp this year…..can't work out how 2 give it a pair a bollocks."
12 of 20"Having a beer with the old man for his birthday. 58 today. Love the fact he's a major pisshead. #likefatherlikeson"
13 of 20"On my way to talk some bollocks with @AlanCarr hope he's got some Jagerbombs ready. Enjoy the last of the sun. U know its gonna f**k off."
14 of 20"Tu-Pac. Bury me a G. Aggressive sexiness."
15 of 20"Oh…. the joys of having an Oyster Card….."
16 of 20"'Danny Dyers Deadliest 100 year Olds Skidmarked Pants'…Coming soon….#ITV"
17 of 20"That moment when you realize that @KTHopkins wants to be friends with ya…..happy Friday my loves. ;)"
18 of 20"Beautiful day…..beautiful…..such a shame that the flys are floating about…..the shit eating busy pricks……"
19 of 20"When I walk in me kids tiny shitted up toy room it's like an explosion of animal noises that nasty wheels on the bus song and general cack."
20 of 20