OMYuck – David Beckham has been eating sperm

In a sentence we didn’t think we’d write today, or any day, David Beckham is probably wiping sperm from the corners of his mouth about now.

D-Beck has been posting pictures to his Instagram account, showcasing Tuesday’s casual lunch: cod fish sperm.

Excuse us while we boak.

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Our extensive research (Google) reveals that the slippery white food is a popular winter delicacy in Japan and is called Shikaro, or Cod Fish Sperm Sac.

Mind boggles

It’s made from cod milt (sperm) and is said to melt in the mouth like butter.

But would Harry Styles put it in his coffee?

We doubt it.

It can be eaten cooked or raw or NOT AT ALL in our case. But y’know, one man’s cod sperm sac is another woman’s Krispy Kreme.

We don’t even know what his second course was:

We’re guessing whale vomit. Dog’s eat it.

They would if they got the chance.