ey, how's your head? Awful? Like the postman is trying to wedge an entire year's worth of bills into your mouth, only the letters are booze and the envelopes are that special sawdust taste you only get with a hangover, oh and also the bills are ACTUAL bills? Yeah, well this isn't going to make you feel much better, unforch: JOSEPH GORDON-LEVITT IS MARRIED.
Yah! We know! Our invite didn't come in time either! So weird! F**k you, postman.
So it looks like JGL tied the knot with his girlfriend Tasha McCauley on December 20 2014 at their home in LA in a lovely little pre-Christmas ceremony. BRB - choking on our tears. TEARS OF HAPPINESS.

The newlyweds (UHUHH-HUHH-HUHHH-HURRRR) confirmed their marital status to People mag, but didn't elaborate on the finer details of their big day.
Not much is known about Joseph's new lady-wife, except that she's the co-founder and CEO of a company called Fellow Robots based in California's Silicon Valley. Which basically means when the world ends and technology rears up to overthrow us, we're going to want her on our side.
Speaking about their relationship back in 2013, JGL said the pair had met through mutual friends.
"I have a girlfriend but I tend not to really like to talk about it in public. The girl that I'm with, she really doesn't want to be a part of it and you can imagine not wanting to have that kind of scrutiny," he said at the time.
The 33-year-old also hinted that the couple might be thinking of having children soon, saying: "I think that I could partner up with somebody - I don't know who that somebody is - I could partner up with a woman and commit to we're going to raise a family and that's a project we're going to commit to for 20-something years.
"I like to not be too committed to any one future that's really far away, necessarily, unless there's a reason, which is why I'm saying if you're gonna raise a family ... I can make that commitment."
Yeah, alright, we get it Jo. You're not that into us. It's FINE. CONGRATULATIONS.
GALLERY: 101 of the best celebrity wedding dresses OF ALL TIME!
101 of the best celebrity wedding dresses OF ALL TIME!

Amanda Abbingon (Sherlock)

Amy Poehler (They Came Together)

Sienna Miller (American Sniper)

Lady Mary Charteris

Princess Claire of Luxembourg

Alesha Dixon

Amanda Holden

Amy Smart

Bar Rafaeli

Beyoncé

Blake Lively

Carmen Electra

Cheyenne Pidgley

Christina Ricci

Crystal Hefner

David Walliams and Olly Murs

Denise Richards
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Denise Van Outen

Denise Welch

Elizabeth Taylor

Flavia Cacace

Rihanna

Kate Middleton

Sophia Winkleman

Kate & Pippa Middleton

Zara Phillips

Victoria Coren Mitchell

Nancy Shevell

Poppy Delevingne

Alexandra Findlay

Maria Susini

Luisana Lopilato

Cher Lloyd

Anna Faris

Farida Khelfa

Lady Gaga

Milla Jovovich

Katy Perry

Mila Kunis

Mariah Carey

Leighton Meester

Kate Moss

Petra Ecclestone

Kate Silverton

Sienna Miller

Viktoria Cservenyak

Chloe Delevingne

Chloe Delevingne

Camilla Parker-Bowles

Victoria Coren Mitchell

Heidi Montag

Helen Flanagan

Hilaria Baldwin

Holly Valance

Jasmin Dustin

Jennifer Aniston

Kaley Cuoco

Kaley Cuoco

Karlie Kloss

Karlie Kloss

Kat Dennings

Katie Waissel

Kelly Clarkson

Khloe Kardashian

kiera knightly wedding dress
Keira Knightley

Kim Cattrall

Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian

Kim Kardashian

Kiera Knightley

Kristen Stewart

Kristen Stewart

Leah Wood

Leann Rimes

Lucy Mecklenburgh

Lucy Mecklenburgh

Mandy Moore

Mariah Carey

Mariah Carey
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Millie Mackintosh

Misha Barton

Myleene Klass

Naomi Watts

Natasha Bedingfield

Olivia Palermo
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Paris Hilton

Princess Grace of Monaco

Rose McGowan

Russell Brand

Shenae Grimes

Siobhan Donaghy

Sarah Jessica Parker

Snooki

Snooki

Tamara Beckwith

Tess Daly
