Four years on from their shock split after six years of marriage, Kim Kardashian has made it clear that she is still very much haunted by the experiences she went through with ex-husband Kanye West as she struggles to move on.
And in the years since, Kanye has undergone a dramatic transformation, quitting his medication for bipolar disorder and changing his name to ‘Ye’ – a shocking new persona that has, at least publicly, been defined by abhorrent, hate-filled speeches and social media rants promoting conspiracy theories, anti-Semitism, misogyny and domestic violence.
Now, it seems Kanye is telling his own unfiltered side of the story in a bombshell new documentary, titled, In Whose Name?, with the trailer last week giving fans and critics alike a rare glimpse into Kanye’s world.
The documentary, which will premiere next month, has been the work of Kanye and collaborator, director Nico Ballesteros, and will show an edit of over 3000 hours of never-seen-before footage documenting the tense and private moments that characterised what has been assumed to be Kanye’s very public meltdown.
The docu-film documents the fall of one of music’s rap icons, with its producer, Simran A. Singh describing the project as a ‘raw and often unsettling portrait, without commentary or conclusion.’
In Whose Name? was also filmed during the very public break down of Kanye’s marriage to Kim, with several intimate clips of their rows furthering the public assumption that Kim experienced a difficult time as she navigated Kanye’s mental health alongside family life with their four children – North, 12, Saint, 9, Chicago, seven and Psalm, six.
In one scene teased in the trailer, Kanye is heard saying, ‘I’m off my meds for five months now’, before the screen cuts to a scene of him closing a backstage door marked ‘Kim Kardashian’. Kim is heard in the background sobbing, ‘Your personality was not like this a few years ago’.
In another take, Kanye, 48, and Kim, 44, are seen rowing while Kanye lounges on the sofa. The KUWTK star is heard telling him, ‘We can talk about that later, but…’ before he snaps, ‘There ‘ain’t no but’.
And now a source tells heat that Kanye’s public and painfully raw portrayal of their marriage has left Kim reliving one of the hardest times of her life, as they tell us the experience has left her ‘traumatised’.
The insider says, ‘She is still very haunted, and if people knew what she truly endured with him they would understand why. She still gets nightmares about it, she’s still very traumatised and it’s all been triggered again by this documentary.
‘He completely tormented her, he broke down her self-esteem and made her feel like she only had value because of him so although she wasn’t trapped with him in any sort of literal way, for many years she was emotionally trapped.’
For years Kim attempted to shield Kanye from public criticism, praising his creative genius and defending him publicly.
In 2020, during Kanye’s ill-fated presidential campaign and during a difficult time in their marriage, Kim described him as a ‘brilliant but complicated man’.
She added… ‘Living with bipolar disorder does not diminish or invalidate his dreams and creative ideas, no matter how big or unobtainable they may feel to some. That is part of his genius and as we have all witnessed, many of his big dreams have come true.’
And after previously admitting that he watched silent porn movies at his mum’s house and later alleging that he had an incestuous relationship with a younger male cousin when he was under 14, the source says Kim also feels ‘sick’ over some of the things she witnessed during her relationship with Kanye – who sources recently told us hoped to develop a range of sex toys modelled on his new wife, Bianca Censori.
They say, ‘The things she went along with just to try and keep him happy make her sick to her stomach.
‘And then there’s the years of dealing with his shifting moods and his deteriorating mental health and trying to manage that and keep it all hidden.’
Kim has also shared her own views of being forced to navigate a relationship with Kanye for their children, saying in 2023, ‘I don’t want to be a part of this narrative. And it’s like, ‘When is this ever going to end? Like, it never will.’
Now the source says Kim still feels trapped in their co-parenting relationship, which sees them split the custody of their children.
They tell us, ‘Kim would love to just cut Kanye off entirely and never speak to him again, but of course that’s not possible as they’re still co-raising four kids together, so she’s stuck in this situation where he’s still a big part of her life whether she likes it or not.
‘She tries to deal directly with him as little as possible and communicates about drop-off times and money matters via their assistants and even Bianca, but they’ll run into each other at school and sports events, plus there’s no escaping his drama because it’s always blowing up on social media.’
Following Kanye’s anti-Semitic rants that same year, Kim again broke down during an episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians, admitting she ‘always will’ hope to see a glimpse of the man she married.
In tears, she added, ‘It’s really confusing to me…so different to the person that I married, because that’s who I loved and that’s who I remember. I’d do anything to get that person back.’
And after she revealed last month that she had ‘finally’ started therapy after being advised by sister Kourtney Kardashian, the source says Kim has also turned to hypnosis to help with her healing journey.
The insider says, ‘Kim’s used hypnosis in the past as part of her therapy, to clear old trauma and she does find it helps. Unfortunately the scars from Kanye are very deep, so this isn’t a one and done sort of healing journey.
‘She is turning to all sorts of things to try to get through this and she goes twice a week to hypnotherapy right now but may ramp it up because it’s really helping.’
And after dating Pete Davidson for nine months following her divorce filing in 2021, the source says that while Kanye wed Bianca in 2022, Kim is still struggling to move on and feels ‘cursed’ by her history with Kanye.
The insider says, ‘It gives Kim the shivers every time she sees him and triggers so many bad memories, plus she’s holding onto a lot of resentment and frustration because a lot of guys don’t want to be dating someone who was married to such an unhinged monster – they’ve told her so themselves.
‘Kim feels like he put some type of hex on her and unless she finds the right tools to cope it’ll be the bane of her life that’ll keep dragging her down.’
They add, ‘Eventually, she hopes to nullify all those negative emotions and learn to shield herself from being affected by Kanye’s toxicity, past and present, but it’s an on-going challenge.’