Anna Friel, the ultimate soaps-to-riches success story along with Kylie Minogue and arguably Steph from CBB (we're joking), stars in the new ITV drama everyone's talking about: Marcella. Pronounced 'March-ella', like you're Italian, except it's Scandinavian.
But if you haven't already been hooked like a fish with television access, allow us to explain a) why you need to get hooked and b) everything you need to know to blag your way around the office until you do get hooked.
What is Marcella?
If Luther was less gross, more Scandi and had less Idris Elba but more Anna Friel, it'd be somewhere around where Marcella sits on the gritty police drama spectrum.
There's a serial killer on the loose who enjoys tieing victims' hands and feet together then putting a plastic bag over their head. Marcella is taking time out of her Metropolitan Police career to sort her life out, but discovers the aforementioned serial killer and decides to come back to work.
Other important facts: it's set in London but made by Hans Rosenfeldt of The Bridge fame. It also jumps forwards and backwards in time a lot and is gross at points (in the opening scenes there's a dog licking a dead woman's blood), but generally leaves a lot more to the imagination than both The Bridge and Luther.
Who is Marcella?
If you're wondering why we compared the series to Luther, this is why: Marcella is violent, unstable and has recently thrown her husband down the stairs and bashed up his car because he said he didn't love her anymore.
Further than Luther though, you can't confidently say Marcella isn't the killer she's supposedly hunting. And therein lies the disturbing heart of the show - and what makes it so unmissable. Unless you miss it. In which case, catch up online or something; Netflix just bought the rights, so if you hang on a bit you might be able to bingewatch the whole thing in a night.
Marcella cast
Obviously Anna Friel is in it, but so is Lady Edith Crawley from Downton Abbey! Well, Laura Carmichael who plays her in the series is. And she's in modern day clothes which, briefly, looks hilarious but doesn't detract from her great performance as young student Maddy Stevenson.
Marcella wardrobe must-haves
The Killing had cardigans. The Bridge had leather trousers. Marcella wears a parka. To be specific, a £535 Woolrich Eskimo parka. Be prepared for way more women knocking about in parkas over the next few weeks.
For anyone interested, fringes are a big deal for the detective too. And all the evil people in the show are blonde. Just sayin'.
What time is Marcella on?
Mondays at 9pm on ITV, aka the perfect slot to watch gruesome murders. What else are you doing on a Monday night?! Apart from Made In Chelsea...
Catch up with Marcella episode 1 over on the ITV Hub now