Melissa Joan Hart news now, and Melissa Joan Hart locked a child in a car yesterday! By accident, though. It is not thought Melissa Joan Hart deliberately locked a child in a car, to teach the child a lesson, or something. That is not the reason Melissa Joan Hart locked a child in a car, and it is actually illegal to suggest she did.
All we’re saying is: witches have a track history of doing wicked things to children.
All we’re saying is: y’all ever read Hansel & Gretel?
All we’re saying is: Melissa Joan Hart is definitely a witch, and definitely draws her witchlike powers from doing things like locking children in cars, and so almost certainly locked a child in a car in an effort to capture their childlike essence and in turn renew her own witchy powers.
Anyway, it’s thought Melissa — who is 38, now, inexplicably — locked her youngest son, two-year-old Tucker, in her SUV while her and husband Mark Wilkerson were on the way to a studio to record.
An eyewitness told E! News: “No harm was done and Tucker was rescued. [The American version of the AA] AAA was able to open the door quickly.”
Thankfully, photographers were on hand to capture every moment of Melissa Joan Hart’s minor family panic, and critics soon took to Twitter to comment on her looks.
She later tweeted: “Yes Tuck is fine after locking himself in our car for a few mins on tues.&yes I looked a lil rough after just arriving home from a nite shoot & massive home construction!” So take that, haters!
Meanwhile, newly empowered by the terror of children, Melissa Joan Hart’s powers grow by the day. What is she planning? We may never know. All we know is: it will be bad, and the only way to deal with her is by drawing a salt pentagram around her and dunking her in a pond.