The morning after the night before, and we’ve just heard that three of the four main political party leaders have resigned in the last hour. What’s this got to do with heat, you ask? Well, we’re pretty sure it’s all Joey Essex’s fault.
Yep, Ed Miliband of Labour, Nick Clegg of the Lib Dems and UKIP leader Nigel Farage have all stepped down today after getting annihilated at the polls.
The poor old Lib Dems only got eight seats in the whole of the country, losing 47, while Labour so far have 230 constituencies going red.
UKIP managed to bag the grand total of, er, one seat – despite all of Nigel’s bluffing.
Anyway, we reckon they were all cursed by Joey Essex. Think about it: the TOWIE star met ALL THREE OF THOSE MEN weeks before the election, and now their political careers are over.
Did he meet David Cameron? No. No he did not. And Cameron won the election.
Conclusion? Joey Essex whispers something in the ear of powerful men and it slowly crushes their electioneering spirit.
Let’s hope we see them all hug it out in Marbs with a few cocktails very soon.
General Election Manwatch special - hottest male politicians!
General Election Manwatch special - hottest male politicians
1 of 13Chuka Umunna, Labour
Constituency: StreathamChuka, 36, 'keeps it real' by taking selfies with the general public and has been tipped as a future Labour leader.
2 of 13Tristram Hunt, Labour
Constituency: Stoke-On-TrentTrunt (geddit?) did drama at Cambridge Uni with them two funny ones off the telly, Daid Mitchell and Robert Webb.
3 of 13Christopher Bertenshaw, Green
Constituency: Worsley and Eccles SouthChris is passionate about the environment but loves "dirty engines". Crikey.
4 of 13Ben Manton, Conservative
Constituency: Belfast South Irish Ben is a waiter by day, political mastermind by night.
5 of 13Frederick Van Mierlo, Liberal Democrats
Constituency: FlydeFreddie (as his mates call him), is a big fan of pub lunches, plays rugby and is fluent in French. Je m'appelle fancy.
6 of 13James Bird, Conservative
Constituency: Birmingham Hall GreenJames was the driving force behind a new local skate park, so we'd quite like him to try a 360 in front of us, please.
7 of 13Joe Beltcher, Green
Constituency: ErdingtonHot hippy Joe has worked as a lifeguard, sports coach and a charity worker – so no-one can accuse him of not knowing about the REAL world before standing for election.
8 of 13Joel Mason, Liberal Democrat
Constituency: ExeterBaby-faced Joel is just 22, so he's currently juggling uni with canvassing. He's packed a lot into his life already though, having lived in France AND South Africa. Nice.
9 of 13Sam Gyimah, Conservative
Constituency: East SurreySam is Parliamentary Under Secretary of State and the Department of Education, studied at Oxford AND is a keen Arsenal supporter.
10 of 13Chris Kelly, Conservative
Constituency: Dudley SouthChris became an MP at the last election, having put a bet on with his politician mate Justin Tomlinson that one of them would become Prime Minister before 2038 while they were still at uni. Sadly, Chris is stepping down after a single term – otherwise he could have scooped £500,000 if he'd won that bet.
11 of 13Anas Sarwar, Labour
Constituency: Glasgow CentralAnas's dad was the first ever Muslim MP in the UK, so politics obvs runs in the family. Anas was elected deputy leader of the Scottish Labour Party but resigned last year to be named Shadow Minister of State for International Development.
12 of 13Tom McNeil, Labour
Constituency: MeridenBeardy Tom is an ardent supporter of Amnesty International AND a practising lawyer. A busy bee, then.
13 of 13Oliver Coppard, Labour
Constituency: Sheffield Hallam Going up against Lib Dem leader Nick Clegg is Oliver, who describes himself as an "Arsenal fan, northerner, aspiring social innovator/chef/photographer". Sounds talented.