This writer hasn’t lied about her age since last weekend, at least (it just happened, OK? And anyway, it happened purely because she forgot her ID, got all flustered and actually made herself sound OLDER – who does that, eh?) but it seems that Paloma told porkies about how old she is for years.
And she fooled us all. We’re doing “reeling” actions now, which look a bit like when a cat slouches backwards and makes a strange face, with jazz-hands thrown in. Look, still reeling.
Nah, not really.
The Mirror has spoken to Paloma to confirm that she is actually 33. YES, THIRTY THREE.
Pictures of her passport were posted on the Internets in 2013, and Paloma owned up to her crimes, but now she’s ready to talk, like, properly, about her age-fibs.
“When I was asked what my age was in that first meeting, I blurted out 23, when I was actually 27,” she told the paper.
“I didn’t plan on doing it beforehand and it wasn’t a calculated thing. It was only afterwards I realised why I said it.
“I remember reading about KT Tunstall being old, and she was 27 at the time. So I felt that everyone was going to focus on my age, not my music. I thought I’d try and protect myself in that way.
“Of course now everyone is like, ‘Oh we didn’t mind’ but I think if I’d come out and been honest in the first place, they’d have been like, ‘Oh, she’s a bit old and she’s making all these mistakes.’”
It’s OK, Paloma, we still like you. Plenty of other famous types have a “stage age”, too – cough, Sinitta, cough – and remember when Naaaaay-dine Coyle went on Popstars in 2001 at the age of 16 and pretended to be 18 to get into girl band, Six?
Yes, we just about remember too, which makes us feel very old indeed. Might have to start lying about our age again, actually.