Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes are having a baby! We’re not crying! Honest!

What? Oh. Oh this? This wheely bin overflowing with scrumpled tissues and empty Ben & Jerry's cartons? Nah, you don't need to worry about that. We're fine. No, really, we're okay. It's just… it's just that Ellen DeGeneres deep, unsure breath… well, she's pretty much just confirmed that Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes are having their first baby. UHUR-HUR-HUR-HUR-HURRRR.

The chat show host took to Twitter today and basically destroyed our hopes and dreams for the rest of infinity with one 140-character message.

THANKS ELLEN DEGENERES. THANKS A WHOLE LOT. There we were, blithely thinking it might have been one big ol' hoax, when BAM! Straight in the lady nuts.

Another piece of evidence has surfaced, with Eva reportedly refusing to go through a body scanner at Los Angeles International Airport back in February - which would coincide with the time she found out she was expecting.

She's also supposed to have told officers there that she couldn't go through the scanner because she was expecting, although she denied saying this later.

"It's so ridiculous," the 40-year-old actress told Ellen on her show. "It all started because I didn't want to go through the scanners at the airport. You know those X-ray scanners, which are really creepy? They basically see you naked, right? And not only that, but there's a radiation aspect to it, so I always opt out."

According to reports, Eva is now seven months pregnant, meaning there could be pictures of Ryan Gosling topless snuggling a newborn within the next eight weeks.

Now 'scuse us - our eyes appear to be leaking liquid again, don't mind us.

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