We've had Sinitta's thoughts on the Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie split, George Clooney has reacted, but now, FINALLY, we know what Geordie Shore's Scotty T thinks of the news that rocked the world from Hollywood to Hartlepool.
But brace yourselves; it's bad. Really bad.
"Seen the rumours that Brad 'fooled around' with that ugly bird from the Batman film who's now reportedly pregnant," Scotty said, referring to Marion Cotillard, the French actor, singer-songwriter, and spokesperson for Greenpeace.
She's also won an Oscar, a Golden Globe and a BAFTA but she hasn't won Celebrity Big Brother or appeared in pantomime in Yorkshire with Zippy and George from Rainbow so… swings and roundabouts.
"All I can say is, if it's true, 1) was he drunk and 2) surely he could have picked someone worthwhile, not a 5 out of 10 who is already married," Scotty continued.
Excuse us while we vomit, will you? Thanks.
"I could understand if it was a single Victoria Secret's model putting it out right in front of him, legs wide open, offering to lick where the sun don't shine, but I just don't see it with this girl," he went on.
By 'girl' we presume he means 'woman', because sexual activity with a girl is all kinds of illegal.
"At the end of the way, we don't know what has happened. Maybe Angie had stopped sucking his d888," Scotty continued in his column for the Daily Star online.
It's funny how they've starred out the word dick, presumably in case any of the aforementioned girls read it, but still print such misogynistic shit, innit?
Maybe it's a spoof column. LOLOLOLOL.
LOL.
*Geordie Shore returns at 10pm on Tuesday 25 October. *
Who leaves? Who returns? Find out EVERYTHING right here.