Celebrity penis news now, and – NO. NO. NO. NO. NO. Stop reading this immediately. We're being serious: this is properly grim.
OK. Don't say we didn't warn you.
Steven Gerrard has opened up about the time he damaged his penis so badly it needed multiple stitches in his new book, My Story.
In a serialisation for the Daily Mail, Stevie writes: "The magic of the FA Cup was bloodied on the day my penis was cut and then stitched shut on an unromantic afternoon in Bournemouth last year."
How poetic is that? We never knew he had such a way with words.
"It was eye-watering. I tried to close down a winger to block his cross but felt a stinging in my privates. I thought, 'Shit — that doesn't feel right!' It was stinging like f**k."
Oh jesus. Oh god. Oh that's horrible.
Steven carried on:
"The gash looked pretty bad, right across the middle. There was plenty of blood. I needed four stitches and the lads were absolutely pissing themselves."
Seriously, we're feeling queasy now. Going to go and have a nice sit down NOT watching the football rn.
Olly Murs' charity football match photos
Olly Murs charity football match photos
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