Regular break-ups are usually pretty horrible, but if we'd just split with Taylor Swift we'd be QUIVERING IN OUR BOOTS.
This is because she's pretty much guaranteed to write a break-up song about you that will forever be played at pre-teen parties and the like.
And we've been waiting (kind of excitedly – is that bad?) for a lonnng time to hear Calvin Harris'. And now it's reportedly HERE.
AND IT'S BRUTAL AF.
It's so bloody brutal that she won't even be singing it – Little Big Town will be.
Hmmm.
The song is said to be titled Better Man, and the Sun reports that the lyrics are as follows.
"I see the permanent damage you did to me.
"But your jealousy, I can hear it now / You’re talking down to me like I’ll always be around.
"You push my love away like it’s some kind of loaded gun / Boy, you never thought I’d run.
"I know I’m probably better off all alone / Than needing a man who could change his mind at any given minute / And it’s always on your terms.
"I gave you my best and we both know you can’t say that.
She closes the song with: "We might still be in love, if you were a better man."
WOWZERS.
This comes after Calvin Harris made a veeeeery suspiciously similar video to Taylor Swift (see here), and Calvin revealed that "all hell broke loose" during their break up.
"It's very difficult when something I consider so personal plays out very publicly," he said.
"But when it ended, all hell broke loose. Now I see that Twitter thing as a result of me succumbing to pressure. It took me a minute to realise that none of that matters. I'm a positive guy," he continued to GQ Magazine.
"For both of us it was the wrong situation. It clearly wasn't right, so it ended, but all of the stuff that happened afterwards..."
Blimey.