The Eurovision Song Contest's bloody brilliant, is it not? The dry ice, the fake rain, the inevitable 'what happens after Brexit?' questions; it might just be our favourite musical event of the calendar.
If nothing else it's the perfect excuse to dress up as Ginger Spice and guzzle a pitcher of Pimm's, innit?
And with this year's contest, like everything else that is good and right, cancelled because of coronavirus we thought we'd look back at our attempts from years gone by. We're talking Jemini. We're talking Scooch. We're talking Bonnie bloody Tyler, for crying out loud.
BELOW: where are the UK Eurovision contestants now?
UK Eurovision contestants: Where are they now?
2003: Jemini - 'Cry Baby'
Liverpudlian duo Gemma Abbey and Chris Comby, aka Jemini, received NUL POINTS in Latvia back in 2003. Since then, Gemma's been convicted for benefits fraud after claiming £52,000 in tax credits as a single mother whilst marries and Chris works in a clothes shop.
2004: James Fox - 'Hold On to Our Love'
Fame Academy alumni James came 16th in 2004 and went on to release the official FA Cup single for Cardiff FC before playing Paul McCartney in The Beatles' West End musical Let It Be.
2005: Javine - 'Touch My Fire'
Javine Hylton just missed out on a place in Girls Aloud in 2002; but represented the UK in Eurovision two years later with Touch My Fire. She came 22nd, but redeemed herself as runner-up on Celebrity Come Dine with Me in 2010. Well done, hun.
2006: Daz Sampson - 'Teenage Life'
Remember Daz? He scored 25 points but still managed to chart at number 8 in the UK with Teenage Life. Since competing in 2006 he's become a football manager.
2007: Scooch - Flying the Flag (For You)'
Scooch's innuendo-laced track (one lyric was genuinely 'would you like something to suck on for landing, sir?') was branded 'absolute shit' by Charlotte Church. CHARMING. The band continue to play Pride festivals and members Caroline and Russ are now an item.
2008: Andy Abraham - 'Even If'
You'll probably recognise Andy from The X Factor 2005. He came joint last in Belgrade in 2008, but didn't let that deter him and still performs to this day.
2009: Jade Ewen - 'It's My Time'
Jade Ewen actually did alright, you know? It's My Time came fifth in 2009. She then joined Heidi Range and Amelle Berrabah in Sugababes and now plays Princess Jasmine in the West End production of Aladdin.
2010: Josh Dubovie - 'That Sounds Good to Me'
Josh now goes by the stage name Josh James after That Sounds Good to Me finished last with just 10 points. People just don't know talent when they hear it, tbh.
2011: Blue - 'I Can'
We had such high hopes for Blue as they hit Düsseldorf in 2011, but they boys blamed political voting for their disappointing tenth place position. Duncan, Simon, Anthony and Lee were then dropped from their record label after 2015's Colours album sold less than 4000 copies in its first week. Awks.
2012: Engelbert Humperdinck - 'Love Will Set You Free'
Actual, real life Engelbert Humperdinck came second to last for the UK in 2012. It was a difficult time for all involved; but he's obviously still doing the whole music thing well into his seventies.
2013: Bonnie Tyler - 'Believe in Me'
We totally forgot Bonnie had placed 19th with Believe in Me back in 2013. Madness.
2014: Molly Smitten-Downes - 'Children of the Universe'
Molly was one of the favourites to win with a song intended to 'break down political boundaries' in 2014; but unfortunately she only managed a measly 40 points. She's still making music, though; most recently appearing on a track with German DJ Zwette.
2015: Electro Velvet - 'Still in Love with You'
Remember The X Factor and The Voice rejects Electro Velvet? Nah, us neither. In case you're wondering, they came 24th in Vienna in 2015 before releasing a cover of Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas in 2016.
2016: Joe and Jake - 'You're Not Alone'
Joe and Jack's follow-up track, Tongue Tied, failed to chart. Shame, really.
Lucie Jones
Lucie Jones competed on series six of The X Factor but was voted off early in the competition. However, that didn't stop her, as she went on to sing for Great Britain in the Eurovision Song Contest, and now has a successful musical theatre career. She is currently playing Jenna in the West End production of Waitress{
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The Eurovision Song Contest 2020 was due to land in Rotterdam back in May but, in place of the cancelled event, we were delivered a Netflix original film called The Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga.
The best part of the film is undoubtedly the performances, which, having revisited the above entries, manage to hit the spirit of Eurovision on the head.
And real life Eurovision fans will love the "songathon" sequence where actual irl winners including Austria's 2014 entry Conchita and 2018's winner, Israel's Netta Barzilai, made their cameos.