The best OITNB inspired prison beauty hacks

You never know when these may come in handy...


by heatworld |
Published on

Season 3 of Orange is the New Black is now on Netflix, and we're so happy about it we even did a little dance when we realised we've still got some episodes left to watch when we get home. Whilst we don't ever plan on going to prison, we can't help but admire the Litchfield inmates for their very clever prison beauty hacks. You never know when they could come in handy, eh?

Tinted lipbalm


She's arguably the most glam inmate who loves to rock a perfectly pristine pout, but Morello's lipstick sure doesn't look easy to recreate in the slammer. That's why we suggest mixing your trusty Vaseline with some non-toxic bright red wax crayons. Melt your crayons and Vaseline in the microwave (or on a hob if you live in the Middle Ages), but be careful not to leave them heating up for too long or it'll like, totally ruin the texture. Decant into a container, leave it to set (you can pop it in the fridge if you're in a rush) and voila! A brand new bright red lippie.

Dry shampoo

We know Pennsatucky's unwashed barnet might be the least of her worries, but we've got a simple way to fix it if you're suffering from similar greasy locks. Blondes should rub cornstarch into their roots to soak up the grease (eww, we know) and brunettes should add some coffee granules to their cornstarch to avoid white granny roots. Talking of coffee granules...

Smoky eyes

Coffee granules also prove to be very useful as eyeshadow. You'll have to prepare to get your hands dirty though, as this one requires a lot of blending with your fingers. Channel Alex and her immaculate eyeliner flicks by using a burnt match as charcoal. You could even kid yourself that it's like one of those brushes you get in a posh eyeshadow palette...

Spot treatments

Being stuck indoors + eating unhealthy prison food = breakout central. Even perfect-skinned Piper has suffered from pesky spots in the past. You can easily fix this though with just a couple of cheapo paracetamol tablets. The acetylsaliyclic acid (we know, we can't pronounce it either) is very similar to salicylic acid which you find in a lot of profesh spot treatments. Just crush a couple up with the back of a spoon, then mix with water for your very own pimple-blasting paste.


We imagine the inmates at Litchfield aren't going to be seeing much sunlight apart from yard-cleaning duties. So to fake natural blonde highlights, simply squeeze a bit of lemon juice in your hair. If you wash your hair just before you go to bed then plait it before it's dry, natural beautiful mermaid waves will follow in the morning (well you can hope, anyway).

Read more OITNB related articles here:

Prison essentials! The top 10 items we'd smuggle into OITNB's Litchfield Penitentiary

OrangeCon: all the news, all the fashion and all the gossip

The best ever Orange is the New Black quotes

Orange is the New Black: who wore it best?

Just so you know, whilst we may receive a commission or other compensation from the links on this website, we never allow this to influence product selections - read why you should trust us