Good news for fans of tight, tight bum cheeks tucked into pleather chaps – the Magic Mike sequel FINALLY has a release date.
Magic Mike XXL will come out in full, fleshy glory on 7 August 2015 here in the UK, once again starring Channing Tatum as stripper Mike and Matt Bomer, Joe Manganiello, Kevin Nash, Adam Rodriguez and Gabriel Iglesias as his band of hair-free men.
Sadly though, Matthew McConaughey will not be reprising his role as the curiously intense bondage gear fan and club owner Dallas – presumably because he no longer has to get his keks off now he’s got himself an Oscar. THINK YOU’RE TOO GOOD FOR US NOW, EH, MATTHEW MCCONAUGHEY? YEAH? YEAH YOU PROBABLY ARE.
But instead of him, there’s a whole load of newbies joining the cast, including Johnny Depp’s fiancée Amber Heard, _Hunger Game_s star Elizabeth Banks, Jada Pinkett Smith, Community’s Donald Glover and, er, Andie McDowell, who’s been in this reporter’s bad books ever since wearing the same Zara dress as her. Oh, and she was terrible in Four Weddings And A Funeral.
Amazingly, the plot revolves around the Kings of Tampa male strippers wanting to go out with a bang – and they’ve got to persuade Mike to help them out with one last performance before they retire for good.
You know where this is going, don’t you? They’re setting this up for circa 2044, when Channing gets talked into doing Magic Mike XXXXXXXXXL. “Come on Channing – one more, for old time’s sakes,” the movie producer rasps. “Goddammit Joe, I’m too old for this s**t – I’m nearly 65. I can’t do this anymore…” Channing replies, a cheeky sparkle in his eye.
GodDAMN we can’t wait for Magic Mike XXXXXXXXXL.