(FYI: this list comes with a SPOILER alert)
Imagining life without our everyday essentials (er, hello iPhone) is pretty dire. But for the OITNB gals, this is the stark reality of prison life. Well, unless you find yourself taking a sneaky trip to pick up some contraband ciggies or lippie. Not that we would ever encourage anyone to smuggle anything anywhere, but we thought we'd list our top ten essentials. Y'know, just in case. If you've not caught up on Season 3 yet, it's on Netflixright now, btw.
A book (RIP Litchfield Library)
We're still ploughing through our 'must read' list (created at the age of eighteen), so we'd take in a good old classic novel such as Anna Karenina. Or maybe Fifty Shades, Taystee's fave.
Hair straighteners
Yep, she always looks flippin' amazing, but Morello's makeshift loo roll curlers don't particularly float our boat. Instead, some mini straighteners wouldn't go amiss (then we wouldn't have to queue for Sophia's salon).
Eyelash curlers
We're guessing the commissary probably doesn't have mascara. So we'd rely on eyelash curlers to flutter our way through places we shouldn't be going and bag ourselves our very own Bennett.
A two-in-one toothbrush and toothpaste
First things first, you never know who you may meet in the slammer. Secondly, bad breath is a definite no-no for both your poor cellmates and your poor relatives during visiting hours. If only Pennsatucky had spent a little more time looking after her gnashers she could have avoided a whole new set (they do look good though).
Sweet snacks
Unfortunately, Bridget Jones will not be swinging by with a truckload of choc like she does for her cellmates when she gets locked up in a Thai prison. So we'd deffo treat ourselves to some hidden sweeties.
Tweezers
Now you may think tweezers are only a necessity for the likes of pluck-happy Alex, but we reckon they are a must for any lady in Litchfield. Eyebrows are the making of a pretty face after all...
Hot sauce
Soz Red and Gloria, but ever since Taystee started to crave hot sauce to season the prison food, we can't get the thought of Tabasco out of our minds.
A onesie
Keeping cosy and avoiding** those** bin bag dresses when there happens to be a bedbug epidemic? Er, 100% yes.
Earplugs
Maybe, just maybe, if you put your earplugs in you can avoid a Crazy Eyes-style midnight peeing by your bed incident. Unfortunately, they don't mask the smell though.
Flip-flops
Skanky showers and stolen shoes? You're gonna need a pair of Havaianas.
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