Charlotte Crosby and Gary Beadle's love story is, obvs, one that will echo through the ages, and be sung over campfires to our great-great-great-grandchildren when the sun eventually explodes and dies.
But their latest exploit is testing even heat's sturdy sense of moral outrage.
Because in the next episode of Geordie Shore: Big Birthday Battle, Gaz and Char have sex… in front of their castmates.
Grim.
In a teaser trailer released by MTV ahead of Tuesday's air date, Charlotte and Gary go on a date to what looks like Sophie Kasaei's dad's restaurant, presumably because Gaz knows he'll get the whole meal on expenses if he plays his cards right.
After their smoochy date – their first one in the whole five years they've been shagging, fighting and tearfully sub-tweeting each other – they retire to the Geordie Shore house for some late-night shenanigans.
AND THEY END UP PORKING IN THE SAME ROOM AS SOPHIE AND MARNIE SIMPSON.
Puke puke puke puke puke
"Making love to Gary is going to be like the first time I tried a cheeseburger," Charlotte says in the voiceover, prompting immediate concerns about just what she thinks you're supposed to do with a cheeseburger.
"Sexy, sensual and satisfying," she adds. Note to self: never take Char to a Byron.
In the romantic green light of the camera's infrared, you can see tell-tale signs of the bed shaking, then some characteristic moaning from Charlotte starts up.
Sophie, wide awake at this point, screams: "Charlotte! Get the f*ck out! It's weird, man."
But Marnie's actually kinda into it, telling them: "I quite enjoy it."
NOW WATCH THE GROSS VIDEO
Did they continue after that interjection? Did the rest of the cast hold up score cards afterwards? You're going to have to watch it to find out.
Geordie Shore: Big Birthday Battle continues on Tuesday 24 May at 9pm on MTV