THE SADDEST UPDATE WE'VE EVER PUBLISHED: The BBC has just announced that GBBO presenters Sue Perkins and Mel Giedroyc are stepping down as presenters, meaning this is their last ever run of the show.
Their statement was, obviously, full of baking puns:
We were very shocked and saddened to learn yesterday evening that Bake Off will be moving from its home. We made no secret of our desire for the show to remain where it was.
The BBC nurtured the show from its infancy and helped give it its distinctive warmth and charm, growing it from an audience of two million to nearly 15 million at its peak. We've had the most amazing time on Bake Off, and have loved seeing it rise and rise like a pair of yeasted Latvian baps.
We're not going with the dough. We wish all the future bakers every success.
Clearly this is horrendous and we'll be calling on Parliament to Do Something About It sharpish.
In news that has OUTRAGED fans up and down the UK (and probably the world – it's impossible to over-exaggerate this), the BBC has lost The Great British Bake Off.
It's a scandal! What do we pay our licence fee for if it's not Bake Off? Other than EastEnders, obvs. And Doctor Who. And Sherlock.
Anyway, unsurprisingly, it looks as though it was cold hard cash – or perhaps a lack of it – that saw the Beeb lose one of its flagship shows.
It's thought that Channel 4 waved a whopping £25 million pound carrot (cake) in the face of Love Productions, who make the show, when it became clear that the BBC weren't going to stump up.
It's alleged that the Beeb currently pay £200,000 per slot for Bake Off, and they were being asked to quadruple that figure.
But has a cool £75 million pay cheque secured Channel 4 Mary Berry, Paul Hollywood, Sue Perkins and Mel Geidroyc?
Apparently not. Blimey.
However, Love Productions are saying that taking *Bake Off *from the cosy arms of the BBC is not about cold, hard cash.
"We are really saddened by this outcome because we always wanted to stay on the BBC," a spokesperson said.
"This has never been about who might write the biggest cheque, but about where we can find the best home for Bake Off.
"With deep regret, after more than a year of negotiations we have been unable to reach an agreement with the BBC."
Bake Off has become a BBC institution since it began on BBC Two in 2010. It moved to BBC One in 2014 and in 2015 it was the most-watched programme with an incredible 15.1 million people tuning in for the final.
And if you didn't cry at least once during that final you are basically made of stone.
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Somebody basically made a bread penis on Bake Off and we loved it