Love Island: Cast mates are COCK-BLOCKED as each couple given a baby

Is it better than dogs? Spoiler: no.

Love Island Adam J

by Georgina Terry |
Published on

If we've learned anything from Love Island, other than the harsh truths of man's inhumanity to man, it's that almost nothing will stop the couples from furiously banging.

Other people in the room? Nae bother, just go at it under the covers.

Your ex-girlfriend in the villa? It's cool pal, sex is a natural function of coupledom.

Your ex-boyfriend in the next bed? Do it ON TOP OF the covers, show him all those moves he's missing.

But, perhaps desperate for an evening not monitoring the night vision cameras, the show's producers have found a sure-fire way to make sex in the villa less likely than Boris Johnson becoming Prime Minister.

Love Island
©ITV2

Yes, we know that's still fairly likely, it was a joke – keep up.

Anyway: babies.

Babies have been sent into the villa for the islanders to look after.

Not real babies, that would be insane, but those crying ones that need to be fed and burped that we were given at school to frighten girls into keeping their legs closed and boys into only having an intimate relationship with a sock.

Did it work for you? Nah, us neither. What with birth control existing.

Each couple is assigned a little screamer and their reaction is mixed.

Adam Maxted said: "We were looking forward to spending our first night together as a couple, and now we’ve got a baby in the middle. That’s quite the cock-block!"

Love Island
©ITV2

But Cara De La Hoyde was all for the task, exclaiming: "Have we got babies? Oh my god we've got babies! I've got a baby…

"I didn’t even have to go through labour, I'm so happy."

Perhaps unsurprisingly, Cara and Nathan Massey won the task and as a reward got to leave the villa for a date.

It's funny how the reward is almost always getting out of the villa, isn't it?

Maybe that makes a bit more sense of our Love Island bae Sophie Gradon deciding to leave.

Well, that and everyone picking on her.

Love Island continues tonight at 9pm on ITV2.

What on earth will we do when it ends? TOWIE and Ex On The Beach, of course.

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