Vicky Pattison has packed a lot into her 36 years. She’s an ex-Geordie Shore star, a presenter, author, actor, Jungle Queen, dog mum to Labradors Milo and Max, podcaster, and writer of searingly honest Instagram posts. Now, she’s part of a new reality show with a difference, The Underdog: Josh Must Win, alongside a dream team of Amber Gill, Pete Wicks, and Nick Grimshaw. More on that later...
In between her hectic work schedule and planning her wedding to fiancé Ercan Ramadan, 30, Vicky recently found time to take a trip to the Arctic with a group of fellow powerhouse celebrity ladies in aid of Comic Relief. As ever, when we chat to Vicky, she’s funny, smart and brilliant company. From fun things such as dogs and vision boards, to more serious topics like her PMDD diagnoses and body image, we had a lot to talk about…
So, what’s the premise of The Underdog?
The contestants think they’re taking part in a reality show called The Favourite, which is a competition to become the ultimate reality TV star. They’re all glamorous and gorgeous with tattoos and boob jobs, and then there’s one guy who’s just a bit normal and nice. He could potentially be overlooked, but he has so much to offer. And that’s Josh!
So, your aim is to make Josh win the show?
Yes. None of the contestants know that it’s a ruse and that there is no such programme as The Favourite. Myself, Nick, Amber and Pete are hidden a few metres away from where they are and we’re watching everything, Big Brother-style. We have to try to orchestrate and manipulate situations in order to give the contestants a chance to see how incredible the underdog Josh really is.
And what is Josh like?
Oh God, what do I say without giving too much away? Josh is a lovely person. He’s a really kind, nice, normal guy who knows himself and is comfortable in his own skin. That’s very rare these days, because reality TV has made being “perfect” seem normal, so no one’s interested in “normal” any more. I think reality TV has lost its way somewhere along the line, and we’re bringing real people back.
How did you, Pete, Amber and Nick get on?
Obviously, I love Pete and he’s been one of my best pals for over ten years. I’m so glad people are starting to see how incredible he really is, because he got a bit of a bad rap due to TOWIE. Amber is a fellow North East girl and she is absolutely amazing. I wanted to rip off her face and wear it as an Amber mask, because she’s so beautiful. She’s also funny and sassy, and she brings such a great dynamic. I’ve been a fan of Nick Grimshaw for years, so it was lovely to spend time with him, as well. I think we worked very well as a team and we’re all huge reality TV fans.
You’ve just done a trek to the Arctic for Comic Relief, alongside Sara Davies, Alex Scott, and Laura Whitmore. How was that?
I’m still defrosting, but it was amazing. I got to spend time with three complete powerhouse women, who are all incredibly brave, strong, and beautiful in their own right. It was a very special experience. It was Comic Relief’s first all-female challenge and it felt good that we were all girls, doing it for the girls. Laura was like the mam of the group, checking we were all warm enough. Sara is sunshine in human form, and Alex is so inspiring. She’s probably the strongest human who’s ever walked the face of the earth. She’s a weapon.
You’ve always written lists of things you want to achieve. Are you a master manifester?
I know some people have a real aversion to the words “manifest”, “spiritual” and “energy”, but I think we all manifest in a way. Whether that’s making a vision board, telling friends our hopes and dreams, or working hard to make shit happen, you’re actioning a hope. I have a five-year plan and I make a vision board. I found an old board the other day and it was lovely to see the things that have come to fruition. I had a picture of a house, Labrador puppies, wedding dresses and engagement rings. I now have my own home, I’ve got Max and Milo, and I’m getting married in May. I also had a big Heart radio logo, and I’m now Heart’s North East drive-time host. The creepiest thing was a picture of my head pinned on Gemma Atkinson’s body, which is alarming. And yes, I have told her about it. It’s nice to have goals and it was incredible to take a look at the board and see how far I’ve come.
How’s the wedding planning coming along?
I flip-flop between absolutely loving it and panicking. I’m so excited that I finally get to marry the man of my dreams, because it’s been a long time coming. Not for a lack of trying, I might add! I’ll be like, “Oh my gosh, this is going to be so beautiful. Our family and friends are going to get to see this next chapter for us.” But then I’m like, “How the f**king f**k am I going to f**king pay for this?” Other brides have said that you have to accept that budgets are a guideline and things do get out of control. The problem is, it turns out that Ercan is a little bit of a princess, as well, so no one is reining me in when I’m like, “Can we try to get Gabrielle to perform?”
On a different note, you talk very openly about your PMDD – premenstrual dysphoric disorder – on Instagram. Why did you decide to do that?
Honestly, if it weren’t for Instagram, I wouldn’t have even found out I had PMDD. I’ve been honest on social media about hangovers, break-ups, having down days and my little period pot belly. As I got older, my periods got worse and worse, and I built this nice little community of people, where we all whinge together. You can be going out with the most understanding empathetic fella in the world, but he just can’t understand the complete shift and change in you.
How did you realise it was PMDD?
I was ranting and raving about how every month I lose my personality entirely. I stop being that excited, enthusiastic, ambitious person who loves to socialise and see friends and can’t wait to post about what she’s done. She disappears… [Wells up.] In her place is somebody who genuinely believes the world would be a better place without her in it. The feelings of darkness took over and it took every inch of me to fight them. These kind women said, “Vicky, it sounds to me as though you have PMDD, not PMS.” I’d never heard of it. I’d gone to doctors and repeatedly tried to verbalise how I was feeling, and I’d been totally dismissed. I got told all sorts – that PMS gets worse as you get older or it could be my contraception. I even got asked if I’d thought about losing weight.
Sorry, what?
I’ve had it all over the years. I’m the NHS’ biggest supporter, but they’re under too much pressure. PMDD can be mistaken for depression, ADHD and all sorts. Apparently, ten per cent of women in the UK suffer from it, but going by the number of messages I get, I would say it’s way more. I took myself to a private doctor and was all geared up to demand a diagnosis. I saw a really understanding female doctor – they do exist, both privately and in the NHS. When I explained everything, she said I had PMDD and I broke down. It was liberating, like, “I’m not insane and unhinged, and I’m not a weak-ass bitch who can’t handle everything other women are going through”.
It felt so good to have that validation. I’m a year on from my diagnosis and it’s trial and error, but I can pre-empt certain things. I’ll say to Erc, “I’m coming into that week where there’s murder in my bones, so if you can please not breathe too loudly next to me, that would be great.” I’ll also let my agents know I’m coming into that spicy week and I may cry in interviews. F**king speaking my truth is the only thing that’s helped, as well as knowing I’m not alone. Also, obvious things like having less caffeine, sugar and processed food and getting outside more. I’m about to start behavioural cognitive therapy, as well.
You’re also a big advocate of self-acceptance…
The older I get, the more at peace I become with every part of who I am. I am always going to have boobs and a bum and be a little bit squishy. I’m not going to punish myself any more, because I don’t look a certain way. The goalposts for what’s beautiful change all the time. Two years ago, we were supposed to be curvy because of the Kardashians, but now the waif look is back. You’re never going to be happy if you try to keep up with body trends, Just get comfortable with who you are. Other things are more important to me, like my dogs’ happiness, and me and Ercan having a nice date night with an amazing dessert. I could spend this year obsessing over being the smallest I could possibly be to fit into my wedding dress. Or I could go on a hen do with my friends and eat and drink whatever I want and go cake tasting with Erc and have a great time. I absolutely know the type of bride I’m going to be – all boobs, bum and wedding cake.
The Underdog: Josh Must Win is on E4, Mondays-Wednesdays at 9pm