Really? Have you got three hours? Saying that, lucky for you lot, we do this full time, so we've actually got about seven or eight hours to tell you the tragic/iconic love story of Love Island's Adam Collard and Paige Thorne.
It all started in the searing hot summer that was 2022; and while the majority of us Brits were hiding indoors like sweaty, pale vampires, a dozen or so gorgeous specimens of humanity (if you're in to that) were being showcased on the Love Island stage, cementing themselves as our latest reality obsessions. One of those sexy humans was Welsh paramedic Paige.
After a brief – albeit emotional – dalliance with bombshell Jacques O'Neill (who just happened to be Gemma Owen's ex), producers chucked Love Island's very own big bad wolf Adam Collard into the villa for a second go of it (we're not sure whether 'it' is love or fame, tbh).
Following Jacques' sudden departure, Adam and Paige grew visibly close, and soon enough, they shacked up, and came in fifth place, just missing out on the grand final.
But what's £50,000 when you've found true love?
The couple returned to the UK and played the post-Love Island game as best they could; doing interviews together (they even appeared together on heat's Under the Duvet YouTube series), adding cringey couple posts to their Instagram grids, filming loved-up TikToks, walking red carpets hand-in-hand, and going on mini-breaks together. You know, work.
While in the villa – around the same time virtually everyone with an internet connection was telling Paige to watch her back because Adam is a red flag with long muscly arms and legs – Paige's mum warned her that she didn't see a future for Adam and Paige. Several weeks later - nugget gate. How do mums ALWAYS know?
Footage of Adam wrapped around a fresher in McDonald's after a personal appearance started doing the rounds online in early October. This was swiftly followed by Paige and Adam culling each other from their individual social media pages. Naturally, the split rumours began to roar.
While Adam made a few digs online, and other Islanders piped in because the power had clearly gotten to them (cough cough Ekin-Su), Paige remained dignified and silent – until she went on GK Barry's podcast, Saving Grace, and spilled enough tea to put Whittard out of business. On the podcast, not only did Paige confirm the BRUTAL details behind the split (the words 'cheating' and 'VIP toilets' were uttered), she also revealed which Love Island 2022 couple she thought was the fakest.
Adam then opened up further on the red carpet at the NTAs and took to Instagram for a sweary message that seriously confused us.
The pair are now painfully single, but no doubt that pain is lessened thanks a new life full of millions of followers, tonnes of freebies, glamorous events, and sponsorship deals. They'll be okay.
Adam Collard returns to Love Island in 2022
Earlier this summer, for the first time in Love Island history, a former Islander returned to the show for a second chance at love; and, of course, that Islander was legendary bad boy Adam Collard.
The Love Island legend – who originally starred on the fourth series of the ITV2 show back in 2018 – was revealed as the latest bombshell about halfway through the 2022 series and his unexpected comeback sent social media understandably WILD.
Even Adam’s fellow 2018 Islanders were absolutely shook over his return, pretty much all predicting carnage which, given the Newcastle lad’s behaviour on series four, was hardly a surprise.
However, the award for best reaction has to ex Zara McDermott, who dated Adam for eight months after they met in the villa in 2018. Her reaction was caught on camera by current boyfriend Sam Thompson (awkward) and shared on Instagram.
In the clip, Sam could be heard saying, “Oh my God, abs and pecs! Wow, he’s jacked! Who is this guy? Who is this absolute animal? It’s your ex-boyfriend! No way!” before the camera panned to a clearly gobsmacked Zara who screamed, “No! You’re f-cking joking!”
Here’s everything you need to know about the history-making Islander... although we can't help but feel we've done this before.
Who is Adam Collard?
Adam is a personal trainer and the founder of fitness program and website Sculpt Fitness. He's best known for appearing on the 2018 series of Love Island. It was revealed on Sunday 10 July 2022 that Adam would be returning to the Villa in series eight as the ultimate bombshell.
How old is Adam Collard?
Adam is currently 27 years old. He was born on 26 October 1995, making him a Scorpio. Weirdly, we're updating this page on his birthday. Happy birthday, boo.
Where is Adam Collard from?
Adam is from Newcastle.
How tall is Adam Collard?
Adam is 6ft 5 inches.
What’s Adam Collard’s relationship history?
Before entering the Love Island villa, Adam had a couple of serious relationships, lasting a year and a half – and he did admit to cheating on a partner.
He said, “The one before last which was when I was younger, I did mess her about and cheat on her which caused a lot of arguments but I was a lot younger. The one I was with last, I genuinely thought at the time that I was in love with her and I was completely loyal. I still got a lot of attention but I genuinely didn’t cheat.”
During his time in the villa in 2018, Adam originally coupled up with Kendall Rae Knight before dumping her for bombshell Rosie Williams. History repeated itself when Zara entered the villa as a bombshell and Adam dumped Rosie in favour of coupling up with the newbie.
They were torn apart when Zara was dumped from the villa but they rekindled their romance in the outside world and dated for eight months. Adam's also dated influencers Andrea Belver and Sarah Godfrey.
From the moment her entered the villa, Adam set his sights set on Paige, The couple left the villa in fifth place and stayed together for several weeks before calling it quits.
Adam is now single.
Check out: Love Island 2018 cast - where are they now?
Swipe through to see what the Love Island 2018 cast are up to now:
Adam Collard and Zara McDermott
Despite acting like a bit of a Lothario in the first couple of weeks, Adam was tamed and seemed completely smitten in the villa when Zara McDermott entered. Zara was then dumped on Day 25, and Adam's head turned when the new girls entered Casa Amor.
Although Adam tried it on with Darryl Sargeant, as Zara watched on at home, things fizzled out, and Adam was later dumped on Day 35. He then met up with Zara when he arrived back in the UK, and the pair dated until February 2019.
Despite moving in together and seeming very happy on social media, Adam and Zara announced they'd split on Valentine's Day in 2019.
Posting a statement on her Instagram story, Zara announced, "I am heartbroken to announce that Adam and I have parted ways. I love him very much and will always have a special place in my heart for him & our time spent together.
"I have tried so hard to be the best person I can possibly be and to make it work. Sometimes in life, you just aren’t enough for someone; no matter what you do for them or how much you try to be. For everyone asking if I’m ok, I don’t know that I am.
"But I know that soon I will be. I will be strong and prove to myself that I can get through this. Love, always, Zara x"
Adam Collard's tattoo
As you will all remember, Adam had a 'Z' tattooed on his hand weeks after he left the villa, showing his love for Zara McDermott at the time.
Following their split, Adam said goodbye to his tattoo, and got it covered up during a trip to Las Vegas with fellow Islanders Wes Nelson, Sam Bird and Jack Fowler. Adam seems to have had the Z cunningly transformed into an N and added an I and another N.
Was Adam Collard on Geordie Shore?
He sure was. During his time in the Love Island 2018 villa, it came to light that Adam not only starred on Geordie Shore but he snogged half the cast.
Adam said, "No I'm not. When I was 18 or 19 I auditioned, it was good craic."
Does Adam Collard have Instagram and TikTok?
Adam Collard Instagram: adamcollard
Adam Collard TikTok: adamcollard_